The Best Metaphor For Therapy I’ve Ever Heard

The Best Metaphor For Therapy I’ve Ever Heard

Madison Longchamp, MS, LPC

When I tell people I am a therapist, I’m usually hit with “oh nice, so you listen to people.” I just grin and nod. Most of us don’t really know how therapy works. We might have visions of someone lying on a couch talking, someone taking mysterious notes, or we might have had some of our own experiences with it-a group, some sessions with a therapist, a friend who attends. But even therapist sometimes have a hard time describing what therapy really is and why it is so powerful. 

The best metaphor I have ever heard is that therapy is a dark room and the therapist has a flashlight. The therapist doesn’t lead the client around the room and tell them where to go or what to do. They observe everything, then they let the client know what they see. They might let the client know that where they’re standing there’s an air vent, that’s why they’ve been so cold for so long. Just a few steps away there’s a blanket and a soft chair to sit…if they would like to walk that way. The client may tell the therapist where they would rather be but let them know they just can’t seem to get there. So, the therapist takes a look with their flashlight and notices a stack of boxes in the way. They tell the client, “these boxes are in the way, we could move them together…if you want”. Any moves are made by the client. The therapist is there always, but never to judge or think they know best. The space is more open to the client because of the flashlight and the therapist is there to support as they explore the room as they never have been able to before. 

Boxes can be filled baggage from our past, trauma, protective mechanisms that don’t work. They can also be filled with memories of past strengths we’ve forgotten, people who cared for us that we could lean on again, wonderful things about ourselves we never noticed. A therapist won’t always have the answers -you might say you want to move the boxes and they may have no clue what lies inside, but they will be there as you sort through it all. 

Therapy can look different for everyone and from therapist to therapist. While there are some standards, we all abide by (thank goodness), we also have our own unique way of approaching this process. So, given the hundreds of different methodologies, interventions, types of therapy, and different credentials we can hold, it is most important to find someone you trust to hold the flashlight and who trusts the process enough to meet you where you are in the room and allow you to find the place YOU really want to be. 

If you want to start exploring, reach out today to schedule an appointment.